the ‘w’ is silent…
GREAT SPEECHES IN HISTORY Ah, to say just the right phrase. To string together in concise fashion the perfect mix of sentiment and meaning–to galvanize the assembled masses. I’m sure all of us at one time have asked “Where are the great orators today?” I know a guy who sleeps outside my building who was asking that just last night. In addition he asked if I could help him out with a little change, because he fought in ‘Nam and still hears...
I’m amazed that newspapers still carry horoscopes. I mean it’s not like there’s an alchemy column, or like the police blotter lists witch sightings–you can’t find a palm-reading report in your Sunday paper. But people still read their horoscopes. I stopped reading my horoscope when I realized it was so generalized that it could apply to anyone. So in the spirit of ‘giving the people what they want,’ and after much divination, oracle-consultation and star-gazing (I’m unemployed right now, so I’ve got...
I’m sure you’ll forgive me if, every spring, i refuse to turn even one cartwheel. But I know how this works. Sure, after a relentless winter, we can now enjoy those special two or three weeks before it becomes too hot and humid. Seriously, this was turning into the mythical Winter With No End. And after ten or so winters here, I’m finally starting to realize something very profound–crappy weather sucks. But what we have in Minnesota is a kind of collective...
Sometimes when I’m creatively blocked I just start randomly typing things into Google. This time I wasn’t as random. Being a spiritual seeker, I searched for ‘God.’ Turns out, that search yielded 497,000,000 results, which I think explains why we can’t get along. Then, just to balance things out, I searched for the ‘Devil.’ Great news–only 160,000,000 results–clearly the Creator has a better handle on Search Engine Optimization. Now I’m figuring that the reason I’m not finding anything definitive is that I’m...
As hopeful as I am in this post-Osama world, the cynic in me always is ready for things to go kerflooey on a global scale. And when things get real scary, like most people, I think about starting my own religious cult. I’ve obviously got the leadership thing down, having been captain of my high-school debate team. If you’re not inclined to join my cult, maybe you’ll want to start your own, and in the that spirit, I’ve put together some tips...