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Who am I?

I’m Michael Dane, and I have successfully avoided real work for most of my adult life. I did standup comedy in the eighties, appearing regularly at the Comedy Store in Hollywood. I’ve also performed on a frozen lake for the opening of ice-fishing season, at a synagogue for Purim, and at the Oxnard Strawberry Festival. Lately, I’ve taken to writing funny things, instead of saying them.

July 28th, 2015 at 12:28am
A neighborhood kid hadn't seen me with my cane before and asked, "Why are you old now?" Ah, the refreshing honesty of children. #kidsaremean
July 27th, 2015 at 2:08pm
I'm sure you're thinking, the world needs another humor site, and you would be correct. Read my latest piece at http://t.co/r3zwBjPfgo .
July 21st, 2015 at 9:27pm
New Ice Age in 2030. If we combine that with the effects of global warming, it will begin an age that scientists will call the Lukewarm Era.
July 17th, 2015 at 12:07am
RT @MrChuckD: Even the 5 percenters at the TOP of HIPHOP said 'STRIVE TO BE CIVILIZED'.I NEVER thought that DEVIL qualities would EVER be S…
July 16th, 2015 at 10:46pm
Spent an hour online & saw no mention of @amyschumer or @foofightersDave. Was scared because I thought the internet was broken. #overexposed