Making Do…A Recipe

TL;DR I made some janky-ass banana bread today

So, I accidentally got about 247 bananas in my last Amazon Fresh order (ok, I actually got 8, but that’s still too many bananas).I didn’t get to four of them in time before they started to turn black. So I thought to myself, “You can just make banana bread!”

Now if you’re playing along at home, like most of my recipes, this one starts with what I DIDN’T have— in this case, one of those electric mixer thingies. Or a mixing bowl. Or a bread pan.

Did that stop me? Well, it probably should have, but it didn’t. Of course, mixing everything by hand and with one working arm was a challenge, and I had to use a casserole dish since I didn’t have a bread pan, but whatever…

To declumpify (a technical baking term) the sugar, which I had apparently not sealed properly, I mixed it with the butter, which I had to heat to make it mixable (go ahead, report me to the National Baking Commission for not using cold butter!).

When it seemed suitably goopy, I added some honey, because I have some honey. For the same reason, I added a couple of globs (metric globs) of peanut butter – – besides, who doesn’t like peanut butter with bananas?

Then I added a couple of eggs which I mixed with the goop, after which I added some amount of flour and a little bit of baking soda. Who bsays you have to be precise when you’re baking?

I also added a big spoonful of mayonnaise, because I had seen sour cream in a recipe for banana bread, and I didn’t have sour cream, but mayonnaise is the same color and texture.

Lastly, the bananas…and since, at this point, my arm was tired, it was more like banana chunks.

Then, into the oven with the casserole dish of goop and chunks for around 45 minutes or so. I forgot to set my timer.

The verdict? It smelled good, and it was edible!

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Posted 16 December 2022 by Michael Dane in category "COMEDY

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