Mister Comedy

Maybe it’s because I watch too many competition shows, or maybe it’s because I think too much, but I’ve gotten really tired of certain phrases…

Why does somebody always have to “go big or go home?” Are those the only two choices? Can’t somebody go big AND go home?

Why can’t somebody go a REASONABLE amount, and then go home? Or go big, but before going home, stop at a friends place?

Or what about this – –  couldn’t you go small, at least at the beginning, then go part of the way home, then go back, go a little bigger,  and then go home again? 

Newly elected representative George Santos (R– –because of course he is) has admitted to lying, or as he calls it, ‘embellishing his résumé.’ Santos also claimed that “a lot of people overstate in their resumes.”

EXCEPT that most of us have never lied about easily verifiable things, like where we worked, where we graduated, or that we had grandparents who survived the Holocaust.

I mean, sure, I lied on my résumé back in the day, but in my defense, I wasn’t trying to deceive 150,000 registered voters, and I fully intended to learn “conversational Spanish” if I had gotten the part.

Either I think about food too much, or I watch too many cooking shows right before bed, because I just woke up from a vivid dream in which I created the following meal…

Sage infused Panko crusted oven-baked catfish topped with wilted spinach, served with collard greens sautéed in chipotle sauce topped with minced garlic, and honey rice (I don’t even know if that’s a thing) topped with crushed pecans.

Now I just need to buy ALL those ingredients. Except rice. I have rice.